Sunday, May 6, 2012

Flora Wong - Long Way Home

How to begin.  Ahh, two hours later, and trying to put this story into something that makes sense.  So here goes.
Brief synopis:  I spent my very early childhood in Helena, Montana with my mother Donna and my father Gar Wong.  As a young family, there was Mom, Dad, me, my sister Karen, brother Gar and my baby sister Debbie.  It was brief.  Karen and I were swept off to LaCrosse, Wisconsin where we went to school and grew up with my Mom and stepfather, Tilford Sebion.  As a kid, I spent many of my summers in Helena and when my grandmother was ill, I got to spend part of a school year in Helena (I was probably 7 or 8).  I have some colourful and vivid memories of that time.  Let me interject, because it's my story, and I can.  Gar and Debbie didn't come to LaCrosse with us.  We were separated and they were brought up by my father and his wife, Helen.  Mom and Tilford had a daughter, Diane, and the three of us sisters, Karen, Diane and myself reached our teen years in the rolling hills of Wisconsin.

Helena 1940's - 1960's:  Dad had a restaurant (Gar's Cafe) when I was really little.  I have vague memories of it.  Shortly after Mom took us to Wisconsin, Dad took his family to Seattle.  Debbie has memories as a young girl returning to Helena to visit our Grandma Ruth and Grandpa Don.  Karen and I use to go and visit our Grandparents too.  Our paths never crossed.  Some of the details of those visits were playing with our cousins.  Uncle Charlie and Aunt Flora's daughters and son (5 in total), and Uncle Freddy and Aunt Ella's boys and girls (6 in total).  My memories include playing next to Yatson's, my Uncle Freddy's restauant, and stopping at Wing Shing's, my Uncle Charlie's Grocery store for penny candy.  And one of my fondest memories was my Aunt Flora's Hum Bow (Chinese Dim Sum), that she would make for special occassions in the back of Wing Shing's.  Last Chance Gultch was the busy main street of Helena and it was at the end of Last Chance that a Chinese community survived for decades.  Playing with the kids, eating many of our meals at either Uncle Freddy's or Uncle Jerry's, House of Wong, are fond memories I cherish.

Present Day:  When we returned from CA at the beginning of the month, my sister Debbie gave me an early birthday present.  A book, Long Way Home by Flora Wong.  It has been 45 years since I left Helena and lost contact with Flora Wong and her family.  The last clear memory I have was at my Uncle Charlie's funeral in 1968 (I was 19).  My cousin Bessie was my age and their youngest, Nancy, was only 12.  Owen and I have visited Helena and had a chance to reconnect with Uncle Jerry, Uncle Fred (prior to his death) and my Aunt Ella and their kids, but we did not see Aunt Flora or her children.  So you can imagine my surprise and delight when Debbie gave me the book and then told me there was going to be a book event that Aunt Flora, Nancy and Nancy husband Tom (co author of the book) were going to be at in Tacoma.  AND we were invited to lunch at Nancy's prior to the event. 

Meeting:  I drove back to Seattle the middle of the month and on April 18th, we went to Tacoma and were welcomed graciously into Nancy and Tom's home.  What a great connection we have made.  Nancy, Tom and Aunt Flora were so very gracious.  We immediately felt at home.  Memories of my childhood came flooding back.  There is something very special about a Wong connection...  they will always take care of one another and will always welcome you with open arms; you will always be family.  AND, as lunch was being prepared in the kitchen, a familiar smell of hum bow overtook my senses.  Yep, for lunch, we were served hum bow and wonton soup.  Deb and I exchanged glances and smiles and then we were all smiling and laughing, knowing that it was our families that shared and now share again these small, and yet huge, familiarities.  Chop sticks clacked and soup slurping commenced.  Well not really quite like that, but it could have...

Aunt Flora's book is amazing.  It's her story and she writes of being born in Boston and leaving when she was 7 years old to return to China with her family.  It was 1936.  Not a good time for her parents to take their family back to Lin Fong Lei Village.  The Chinese Communists were beginning to revolt and in 1937 Japan began it's invasion into China.   The book tells of Aunt Flora's life as a child in China and her Mother's dedication in the late 40's to return her children to safety in the United States.   A difficult and bittersweet story to write. 

My Aunt Flora had a grade 2 education when she returned to the United States.  Today she, with the her son-in-law, Tom Decker have written her story.  My Aunt took swimming lessons with her children while they were growing up, tap danced with Thel (her #3 daughter), and at the urging of Poy, competed in her first running race in 1989 and ran her first marathon in 1991.  As a swimmer and runner, she has competed in many athletic events and has 632 medals to date.  And she is not done! 


Front Row:  Aunt Flora (Mom Wong)
Second Row:  Bess, Gloria, Thel and Nancy
Back Row:  Poy's Wife, Mischief, Poy and friend, Nancy

My immediate family have stories too but unfortunately with Mom and Dad now gone the real story has gone with them.  Mom, particularly had repressed some of her stories and then some of them, she had probably embellished and others forgotten.  But we have gleaned a sense of what her life was like back then.  We are hoping with some of Aunt Flora's story and with Nancy's help, we might be able to piece together a time line and a clearer story of our own.


My Dad, circa 1950's?


That's Debbie in Mom's arms.  From left to right:  Nadine, Gar, Karen

 

3 comments:

  1. Very nice synopsis. It has been wonderful reconnecting with the past and going forward into the future!

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  2. Hey you two - what a great event to participate in and cherish. And, yes, Nadine, a wonderful synopsis. I have never seen the photo on the bottom with me, you and Gar. Which of you has the original - can I get a no less than 300 dpi jpg of it? Smiles, LOL. Love to you both. Karen

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  3. Karen - all those pictures I gave you guys in Desert Hot Springs were scanned at 600dpi and that was included in the batch. D

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